A CAUTIOUS DISCLAIMER, A POSSIBLE APOLOGY, AND A FRANK APPRAISAL OF MY ROMANTIC LIFE
WHO I AM: I’m a 24 year old Caucasian male teacher’s assistant in a special education class near a large Midwestern city. As I’m typing this, I’ve been working in this field for a year and a half. The students I work with on a daily basis have mild to severe disabilities, ranging from autism to Down’s Syndrome to things I hadn’t heard of until I started teaching. I “have” a BA in English and no training or education specific to this field. I’m just a guy that likes to tell people what he thinks about stuff.
WHAT I SAY WHEN I’M ASKED WHAT I DO: “I’m a teacher.”
“Really? What do you teach?”
“Well, I’m a TA in a special ed class.”
“Oh, wow.”
(The conversation then dies. I thought one of the perks of the job would be female attention. Oh, he must be so sensitive and caring! I was wrong. The best way to kill a mood is for me to talk about my job. It’s like responding to a casual comment about the weather with a story about your mother’s breast cancer.)
WHY I’M WRITING THIS: “Why not?” is the first question that comes to mind, but there are other, smarter-sounding reasons, as well. I’d like to show people how complex, dramatic, painful, elating, and utterly unique the world of special education is, without the cheap inspirational tone that this sort of business is usually draped with. I want to be honest, which will occasionally mean sounding like a monstrous asshole. It shouldn’t come as a surprise that anyone who teaches anything isn’t always filled with love and energy. I’m also curious about whether or not parents of kids with special needs will read this, and if they do, I hope they will get a healthy and honest perspective on the people that spend 8 hours a day with their children.
MY INTEREST IN CONFIDENTIALITY: I plan on being obnoxiously vague. All names have been changed, including all the students, coworkers, locations, and basically everything else that could possibly connect this blog to the real world, except my thoughts and experiences. If this was about the Roswell landing, all you’d be able to glean from it is that an event occurred. I’m not especially excited about the prospect of litigation, the termination of gainful employment, nor of airing my students’ dirty laundry all over the internet. I’ve traded specificity in names and places for the specificity of events. (For the most part, I rename people and places based on things they remind me of.)
I NAMED IT CANCELED FOREVER BECAUSE: I used to work with a student who, when he didn’t like something, said it was canceled forever. Math class? “I hate math class. Math is canceled forever.” Science? “I hate science. Science is canceled forever.” Animals? “I hate animals. Animals are canceled forever.” Except bears, he liked them. But generally if it wasn’t a train, it wasn’t worth his time.
AS TO WHETHER OR NOT ANY OF THIS IS TRUE: As much as anything else. Yes, it is, but there’s no way to prove it to you.
HOW OFTEN I PUBLISH: I aim for every weekend. I will probably hit every other. I do my best.